Your employees are lonely (and they're probably not telling you)

The stats are not in our favor:

Some 72% of global works feel lonely at least monthly (55% say they feel lonely weekly).

Loneliness can shave 15 years off a person's life.

These are just some of the insights that jumped off the page at me as I read Connectable by Ryan Jenkins, CSP and Steven Van Cohen, MS . These two wrote a fantastic book about why community at work matters.

What I like is how the authors work hard to show that loneliness isn't the end but rather the beginning toward a more connected workplace. As they say, "Loneliness isn't shameful. It's a signal."

And who's loneliest? Generation Z. That's right - the generation that's more connected than ever is also lonelier than ever. The group born with devices in their hands, for whom "connection" is second nature is actually the least deeply connected group.

What exactly is contributing to all this loneliness? According to the authors there are 8 factors affecting your workforce:

1. Busyness
2. Technology
3. Dependency shift (using Google rather than asking a neighbor)
4. Immediacy
5. Remote work
6. Always-on work
7. Overly professional
8. Lack of purpose

I know that for me, near the end of 2021, numbers 5 and 6 hit hard. I worked more than ever to keep my business alive and without a community and a lot of in person meetings (and an infant at home) I could (and did) put in all the hours I wanted from the confines of my home office.

Shame on me.

And now, more than ever, people aren't leaving bad jobs; they're leaving lonely ones.

The authors state:

"Even among the perpetual company of others within a company, people are lonely. It's ironic that people aren't finding company inside their company. But loneliness doesn't discriminate. Loneliness doesn't know if you are at work or home, introverted or extroverted, young or old."

And loneliness is also ironic because most of us respond to being lonely by further isolating ourselves rather than reaching out and asking for help. So we can't tell our employees to "call a friend."

We, leaders, have to be the friend that calls.

More advice from Jenkins and Van Cohen:

"In the world of organizations, it's important that leaders take the helm in building belonging because when it doesn't exist, people find it elsewhere. And that elsewhere just might be joining a competitor or becoming part of a countercultural group in the company. Creating a culture of belonging is an effective way to create employee engagement and loyalty."

"When employees feel like they belong, they are 167% more likely to recommend their organization as a great place to work."

And for leaders?

"No longer can leaders afford to ignore feelings of loneliness [within themselves]. Leaders must proactively work through loneliness so that they can eventually help their teams do the same."

But the number 1 thing you can do as a leader to fend off loneliness among your employees and create authentic community at work? Be interruptible.

Sure, block off time for deep work but look your team in the eye during meetings. Pause crafting that policy email to listen to the question from a coworker. Don't check Slack when sitting across the table from someone.

When you're there, be all there.

Leaders can help end the epidemic of loneliness at work if they're able to:

• Name loneliness when they see it (in themselves and others).
• Create meaningful moments of connection that let employees be their full selves at work.
• Connect their entire team to a greater purpose and mission.

I think we can be the generation to end workplace loneliness. We just have to be willing to go first.